Intentionally Married

Posted: April 7, 2010 in Uncategorized

Steve and I have been married 25 years and maybe the most significant thing that we have discovered is this:  we did this on purpose.  We didn’t fall into marriage.  It took dating and planning and money and communication.  Getting married required work, but it was mostly fun work.  Staying married takes work, and it’s not always as fun.  For the first many years of our marriage, Steve traveled for business frequently and then we had an eight-year break where he was home all the time and most of the traveling we did, we did together.  In October, however, he returned to a business that takes him to Florida nearly two weeks of every month.   While it’s been a big adjustment, I can say this with confidence:  our marriage has never been better.   It’s not better because we like being away from each other, it’s better because we have had to look at how we live and get way more intentional about taking care of our relationship.  In fact, let me be transparent enough to say that the past eight years of doing everything together – we shared an office for goodness’ sake – was probably our weakest season in terms of cultivating our friendship and intimacy.

Over the next few days, Steve & I are going to share a few things we’ve learned in the past six months (and 25 years) that have helped us fall deeper in love and become more secure in our life together.    I hope it builds hope in you for the marriage you have or the marriage you want.

Behold: Weddings are easy, but marriage is the prize.

  1. Carol Neciuk says:

    Your right Bo, we get one chance to have a great wedding…. but everyday from then on to have a great marriage. So here is to making every day great!!! I am looking forword to the insight that your extra three years experience have on us!

  2. Whitney Parnell says:

    I’m surprised that you started that phrase with “Weddings are easy”! 🙂

  3. Jenn Hoff says:

    Love it!
    What does Steve do that takes him to Florida? I’ve been meaning to ask that.

  4. bolovesjoe says:

    Yeah, Carol, it’s years 22-25 that are the killer! Ha. I kid. I didn’t think we were three years ahead of you guys…it seems like we got married closer than that. I think because it was that season when EVERYONE was getting married.

    Whit – honestly, your wedding was one of the great joys of my life. So much fun. Easy might not be the right word – but it was wonderful for sure!

    Jenn – Steve is a systems consultant for Navis Technologies and his territory is Orlando, Florida. He generally works there a week, here a week, repeat.

  5. Jenn Hoff says:

    Awesome! That leaves me with so many more questions. Love a good ambiguous job title! My Steve’s got one of those too.
    Guess we should have coffee. 🙂

    oh and…ps. Why aren’t we all in Orlando, FL with Steve? Have you noticed it’s snowing still?

  6. Joy says:

    Weddings are EASY?! Never have I wanted something over so much in my life.

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