Have you ever been waiting without knowing what it is you’re waiting for? That’s me right now. I don’t have an end goal or vision of the desired outcome, I’m just sort of waiting for the timer to ring.
I don’t know when or how this season started. I only know that’s it grown uncomfortable; like a midnight craving for something very specific without knowing even what food group to start in. Ice cream? Nah. Doritos? Nuh uh. Dill pickles? Nope, that’s not it.
Dr. Seuss says everyone is waiting…waiting for the bus to come or the plane to go or a bell to ring or the rain to go or the phone to ring or the snow to snow. Waiting.
In the movie The Terminal, Victor holds onto his pager as if it holds the key to life, death and all of his future freedom – because it does – and says, “I wait.” (Sniff. Man, I love that movie.)
And Job said, “All the days of my struggle, I will wait, until my change comes.” I could easily end this wait and just get up and do something already, but that’s not the answer this time. This isn’t a motivation issue, it’s a mystery-of-His-will issue and I know it. I can feel His hand, holding me back until the gun goes off and I’m so excited to hear that sound, but it’s odd to have really no idea which direction I will run when I do. I’m sure it will be clear and compelling in time and I know He’s doing things in me that are getting me ready for the race.
But for now – like Victor – I wait.