As we begin the 2008 Holiday shopping season, I wanted to share with you some Christmas items I’ve come across recently that really, truly, should not have been created under ANY circumstances.
First up, partying starfish! Really, unless you have a beach house where you spend the holidays, and unless that house is surrounded by promiscuous shellfish…these are inappropriate.
Next, have you ever had trouble hearing God’s voice? The Talking Jesus Doll is here to help! For $20 bucks you can totally have Jesus speak to you.
This one disturbs me on many levels. Primarily: Can a Gingerbread Man and a porcupine have babies? No they cannot. Because a porcupine is an animal and a gingerbread is dessert.
Um…for the following, I have no words. (And what is with the disturbing trend of dressing animals in bikini tops?)
But please notice the “best seller!” bubble there.
Wind-up Gum Drops? Creepy!
However, wind-up Winter Hats? Totally cute!
Here’s another talking doll for your enjoyment:
Except this one is Mary, so when you press the button, it’s just silent. Cuz she’s pondering things in her heart, that’s why! Pa-dum-pum! Thank you, I’ll be here all week. (Actually, she quotes verses from Luke.)
Finally…here’s something that amazes me, only because I can’t believe it’s taken over 2000 Christmases to come up with the concept:
With wishes for a holiday season filled with warmth, love and fully-clothed Christmas tree ornaments,